Kumar is still among the biggest winners of the hit show. He took to his Facebook account to narrate the incidents that unfolded soon after he bagged the KBC 5 title.
Sushil titled the post as, ‘The worst phase of my life after winning Kaun Banega Crorepati.’
“2015-2016 the most challenging time of my life. I didn’t know what to do. Because of being a local celebrity, I would attend programmes for 10 or sometimes even 15 days a month somewhere or the other in Bihar. Consequently, I was drifting away from my studies”, he added.
While his professional life was not going well, Sushil’s marriage hit rock bottom. His wife complained that he did not know how to differentiate between good and bad people and that he does not worry about the future.
Here’s the full post by Sushil on Facebook:
“2015-2016 the most challenging time of my life. I didn’t know what to do. Because of being a local celebrity, I would attend programmes for 10 or sometimes even 15 days a month somewhere or the other in Bihar. Consequently, I was drifting away from my studies.
Meanwhile, a few good things were happening too. With the help of a friend, I had started a small business of running a few cars in Delhi, and for the same reason, I would often visit the capital.
Due to the nature of my business, I came in contact with a few boys studying media in Jamia Millia, those studying at IIMC, their seniors, and also a few others who were researching JNU. I also got introduced to some theatre artists.
However, when these students and artists would talk about a subject, I would feel less about myself and realised that I didn’t know much about other topics or subjects.
And gradually, along with many other things, I got addicted to alcohol and smoking. It so happened that If I stayed in Delhi for a week, I would indulge in drinking and smoking on all the days with seven different groups. I found their talks fascinating since it was all new to me, whatever topic they spoke about.
In fact, in their companionship, I gradually started taking media very lightly. We would spend the days whiling away time by watching films.
And now, how did I become bankrupt…? You will find the story a little ‘filmy’.
That night, while I was watching the film ‘Pyasa’ which was towards its climax scene, my wife entered shouting that I will go mad watching the same film over and over again. He said that if I wanted to continue, I must leave the room. I was sad because we hadn’t spoken for over a month and the way we finally did, it meant we weren’t going to talk further, so I shut my laptop and went out for a stroll.
And while I was strolling, a journalist from an English newspaper called. While everything was going fine, suddenly he asked me something which left me irritated, so I randomly told him that all my money was exhausted and I had two cows and was surviving by selling milk and earning some money off it. And after that, all of you must be aware of the impact of that news.
Soon after, all those who I was surrounded with, cornered themselves. I wasn’t invited to events and that’s when I got some time to think about what should I do next.
At that time, I was a big cine fan, I had watched almost all national award-winning, Oscar-winning films including those of Ritwik Ghatak and Satyajit Ray’s. I had started dreaming of becoming a film director. In the meantime, my wife and I had a huge fight after which she left for her father’s place and asked for a divorce. Then I realised, that if there was a way to save this relationship, it was to go out and become a film director and come back with a fresh identity for myself.
Consequently, I spoke to a producer friend, who asked me some technical questions which I was unable to answer. Later, he said that I should work on television for a few days and that he would at an appropriate time give me a job with a film producer.
Soon after, I started working at a big production house. I came to know about a lot of things — story, screenplay, dialogue copy, prop, costume, content among other things. But I felt restless since there were only three places — courtyard, kitchen, and bedroom — where most of the shoot would take place.
I had come to Mumbai with the dream of becoming a film director, but then I left one day and started staying with one of my lyricist friends. I would lay in the room and watch one film after another or read books that I had brought with myself. This continued for about six months where I would smoke a full packet of cigarettes in a day.
Since I was staying all by myself, here, I got the opportunity to look at myself objectively. And I realised a lot of things.
I realised that:
- I am not someone who has come to Mumbai to become a director, rather, I am a fugitive who is running away from the truth.
- Real happiness lies in doing the work of your choice
- One can never calm certain emotions like arrogance
- It is a thousand times better to be a good person than just being a ‘big celebrity’
- Happiness is hidden in small things
- One must strive to help people as much as possible that that must start from his/her own home/village.
In the meantime, however, I wrote three scripts that a production house liked and gave me Rs 20 thousand for it. (They justified the payment with certain excuses like the idea of the film was very good, but there was a lot of work that still needed to be done on the story and that the climax was not good, etc. )
Soon after, I returned home from Mumbai and prepared to become a teacher. I got through.
Now, I also involve myself in various environmental awareness projects and that gives me a strange sense of peace.
I have been sober since March 2016 and have also quit smoking last year.
“Now, there is always a sense of enthusiasm in life and pray that I get several opportunities where I can work towards spreading awareness about environmental issues, because that is what I enjoy doing. I want to earn just enough for my survival and keep doing something or the other for the betterment of the environment.”